We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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