At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
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I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
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We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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