Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Randomize
