He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize