i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
