dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
So many bounce houses so little time
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
