I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
