Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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