I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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