So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
