Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize
