chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize