There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
