we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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