how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Randomize