Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
