I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
porn star boner night. come get it.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize
