so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize