Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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