new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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