I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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