I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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