its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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