you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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