Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
