the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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