But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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