it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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