Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I will die if light touches me.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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