Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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