she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
