Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
