Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
