I can't watch pbs sober anymore
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
