Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
