I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
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