yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Randomize
