check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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