You're completely useless in the revolution.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
People in love make me want to vomit
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
