i jhust puked up my retainher.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I look better un-naked...
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
