If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
