"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
You smell like a Billy Joel song
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
