i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I think I am morally bankrupt
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
