Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
