is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
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