sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
