There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
