I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize