I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
