i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize