And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
