Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I just want nice things and good sex
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
